Trauma experienced during childhood or adolescence can have profound repercussions on romantic relationships in adulthood. Following one or more traumatic events, a state of post-traumatic stress (PTSD) may manifest, leading to severe anxiety.

What are the types of post-traumatic stress?

There are two types of post-traumatic stress:

  1. Typical post-traumatic stress disorder : It occurs after an event unique and unexpected (accident, attack, etc.).
  2. Complex post-traumatic stress disorder : It appears when the person has been exposed to traumatic acts repeated or prolonged (rape, childhood violence, devaluation, rejection, abandonment, etc.).

A person suffering from complex PTSD may experience didifficulties in building healthy and lasting relationships with a partner. She may tend to sabotage these relationships or unconsciously attract people who are reminders of her trauma.

It’s important to don’t blame your partner or the whole world. It is very possible that difficulties finding or maintaining a stable relationship are linked to complex trauma.

5 signs that PTSD is harming your relationships

Here are 5 signs that complex PTSD might be at the root of your relationship problems:

Sign 1: fear of commitment

  • Every time your partner offers to move in together or cross a new stage in the relationshipyou feel a intense anxiety in the face of change and the novelty. If with each commitment you lose confidence in yourself or fear of no longer control your feelingsthis could be a sign of complex PTSD.

Signe 2 : hypervigilance

  • You startle easily, shake, and constantly analyze your environment. Every physical contact makes you uncomfortable or anxious.

Sign 3: fear of abandonment

  • The constant fear of being abandoned can lead you to adopt self-destructive behaviors or to you attach excessively to your partner.

Sign 4: excessive apologies

  • People who have suffered abuse or trauma may develop a tendency to apologize frequentlyeven for things that they are not responsible, in order to avoid conflicts. This habit is often linked to a low self-esteem and a need to please others.

Sign 5: unwanted sexual consent

  • If you accept or initiate sexual intercourse without really wanting it, this could be a sign of complex PTSD. You can do it for you immediately feel loved by your partner, or because sex seems reduce other negative emotions. Once physical intimacy is achieved, you can move away abruptlyend the relationship, or prevent it from starting, revealing a style anxious attachment triggered by complex trauma.

Recognizing these signs is the first step toward healing and building healthier relationships. It is essential to seek professional support to deal with these traumas and their impacts on your relationship life.

Anya El Hamdaoui

Editor

June 14, 2024, at 2:10 p.m.

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