Verified on 04/18/2024 by Alexane Flament, Editor
Do you tend to ask yourself a billion questions, regardless of the situations and people involved? You may be suffering”d’overthinking”.
This term commonly used by American psychologists is a big headache. How do you know if you’re thinking too much?
On her Instagram account, clinical psychologist Michaela Dunbar reveals the eight telltale signs.
The need to understand the origin of the comments made
If most conservation leaves room for spontaneity and some people sometimes show clumsiness, you do not share this idea.
On the contrary, you think that a sentence was not said by chance. After a discussion, you often find yourself thinking about the origin of a word: “Why did he use this word and not another? What subliminal message did he want to send to me?”
The feeling that someone is responding to you poorly or harshly
People who overthink things are often touchy. So, if someone answers you a bit harshly, you will immediately wonder what you did wrong.
Negative thoughts will take over, as will a certain feeling of paranoia.
As psychologist Susan Nolen-Hoeksema explains in her book Why do women worrypeople who suffer from aggressive rumination constantly seek to protect themselves from others.
As a result, they “focus mainly on the wrongs they imagine they are victims of”. Why not consider that the person you’re talking to may simply have had a bad day?
The need to decipher the attitude of others
Overthinking goes hand in hand with the need to decipher the behavior and attitude of others. Very instinctively, you will therefore analyze the non-verbal communication of the person in front of you, their facial expressions, the intonation of their voice…
So many elements that will allow you to get an overall idea of the feelings felt by your interlocutor towards you.
Constantly thinking back to embarrassing moments or blunders from the past
All it takes is one little thing or one clumsy sentence for you to no longer know how to act naturally with a person… This scenario totally corresponds to people who suffer fromoverthinking.
Even though the awkward moment was months ago, you can’t forget what happened. Instead of moving forward, you’ll instead dwell on that embarrassing memory.
Ask several people for opinions regarding your choices
Making a decision and sticking to it seems complicated to you. “Is this really the right one? Have I taken all the parameters into account?”
To help you make the right choice, you prefer to ask the opinion of several people, considering that if many of you think the same thing, it means that it is the right decision.
Difficulty falling asleep because you think too much
After a tiring day, nothing better than a good night’s sleep! Unfortunately, at bedtime, thoughts mix and multiply, preventing you from sleeping.
You think about everything that happened in the last 24 hours, but also about the potential events of the next day.
Don’t move on after a review
Psychologist Michaela Dunbar finds that difficulty moving forward after criticism is also one of the signs that you are thinking too much.
Following a reproach or admonishment, you are unable to move on. You will think for a long time about how the criticism was made, whether it is justified, what you should have responded…
The obsessive need to control everything
Finally, obsession with control also indicates that you are thinking too much. If you need to plan every day down to how your interview is going to go, then you are affected by overthinking.
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